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Child of Divorce

                      I'm a child of divorce, another victim of the courts
Security was an illusion that got shattered by force
Only the children know            (where did the little child go?)
Only the children know            (where did that little child go?)
When the court takes over       (he's growing up too fast)
You can never go home           (he wants to go back to the past)

I can't talk with my dad, my dad's already way too sad
I can't deal with my feelings, and they're the worst I've ever had
I'm a child of divorce               (where did the little child go?)
Another victim of the courts     (where did that little child go?
Security was an illusion            (only the children know)
That got shattered by force      (only the children know)

I get so worried about my mom, she's trying hard to stay calm
But she's so angry inside, its like a part of her died
Now I can't sleep at night, I know my mom and my dad still fight
On and on                               (where did the little child go?)
Only the children know            (where did that little child go?)
When the court takes over       (he's growing up too fast)
You can never go home           (he's wants to go back to the past)
I don't believe in divorce          (only the children know)
I don't believe in divorce          (only the chidren know)
Why take vows and get married?    (only the children know)
And end it all in divorce?          (only the children know)
Only the children know, no no no, NO!!!........No no no Oh Mom, oh Dad, please, please, please don't fight, please, please, oh, oh, oh oh......

Credits:

Drums and vocals:   Peter Cross
Everything else: Tim McDonald, without whom none of Peter's songs would have been recorded
Recording in SF:   Tim McDonald, in his basement recording studio in S.F.
Final Mix:   Mark Needham

Commentary:

Peter and Tim recorded Child of Divorce in the fall of 1994, after Peter had survived the initial atomic blast of separation from his wife and children, the agony of which caused him to start writing songs again. Child of Divorce was written during the summer of 1994, along with Knight in Shining Armor, The Ghost of our Love, etc. Strong themes of real pain in these songs. No faking here. This is songwriting from true experience. Peter wanted to write about pain, but wanted to express the pain of divorce from a different point of view.....that of the children who suffer the most, and the most unfairly of all. Because Peter was undergoing the completely humiliating experience of "supervised visitations" and "court approved evaluation" he had a driving need to involve his sons in his music because it was the only thing he could offer which was uniquely his and his alone. So he asked his sons to help him write Child of Divorce. Peter had the title, the general concept, and the music in his head, but wanted his sons to write the lyrics. As it turned out, Peter wrote the lyrics, and his sons censored them by saying yes or no to each line if it was or was not a thing a child would say or think. It worked.....the pain is there.....the perspective of the children is there. This may be one of the definitive songs about divorce (who knows?)

Peter had to literally beg Tim to record with him. After so many years of separation, Tim had very little free time and no clue that Peter had any real talent (besides, Timmy completely underrates himself and thinks guitar players like him are "a dime a dozen"....Tim hasn't got a clue how good he really is). Since Peter and Tim had no drum set-up or other players at that time, Tim played the basic drum machine track, Peter played drum machine tom tom tracks and Tim played all the rest of the tracks. Peter sang all the vocals, as usual. After he heard the final results, Tim agreed to record a few more songs with Peter, and the recoring career of Peter Cross finally began for real. From this time forward, Peter and Tim strove to achieve recording perfection, and Peter finally ended up with Mark Needham at Hyde Street Studios through the grace of God. But Child of Divorce is raw Peter Cross and Tim McDonald, garage rock, in the most real sense of the words.

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Songs and Lyrics Copyright © Peter Cross
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